Enviros light up a contradiction

By The News Virginian Staff

Published: May 19, 2008

Drilling into the sophistic strata that pass for rationale in the dimly lit celestial space occupied by environmentalists, one discovers veins pulsing with myth, contradiction and, of course, mercury. The result: Hazmat crews are on standby for the looming calamity of a shattered light bulb.
From the sages who have exposed, so to speak, the sundry ecological hazards posed by the flush toilet comes now the revolution of the compact fluorescent light bulb, which is to its incandescent brother what Castro was to Batista — usurper with a twist.
Enviros say the fluorescent version of Edison’s invention, distinctive for its spirals and what they contain, uses less energy and lasts longer. Unless, of course, one happens to fumble the bulb, in which case the next step is progressive compared to the old-fashioned notion of simply sweeping away the mess. Forget do-it-yourself cleanup. Instead, alert Poison Control, the nearest center for disease control, a state environmental agency, suppliers of plastic and your bank.
Brandy Bridges can explain.
Earlier this year, the mother from Maine bought two-dozen CFL lamps in an ill-fated attempt to pinch pennies on her electric bill. The idea was going along swimmingly until Bridges allowed a bulb to slip from her fingers and crash onto the floor of her 7-year-old daughter’s bedroom. The energy savings are pouring in, and it’s a good thing for Bridges, since she’ll need the extra money — more than $2,000 — to clean up her CFL bulb disaster.
Light burns no longer in the bedroom, which is sealed in plastic, lest dust from the bulb spill meander into the nostrils of such living things as people and pets.
The lamps beloved by leftists get their energy boost from mercury, which draws the traditional ire of environmentalists put off by the fact that the element is poisonous. That has not muted their ardor for CFLs. A stumbling move is afoot to ban incandescents in favor of CFLs in Australia, the European Union, Canada and another foreign country, California.
Backers of the new-fangled bulb say the 5 milligrams of mercury it contains are fewer than those found in the tip of a ballpoint pen. Of course, ballpoint pen tips rarely shatter on bedroom floors the way Bridges’ bulb did. Mercury at room temperatures turns to vapor, which means that one can inhale a healthy helping of the neurotoxin unawares. Exposure can cause tremors, mood swings, irritability and nervousness (effects known intimately by environmentalists).
For these hazards, enviros offer a comic’s treatment plan. Worried about the risk of mercury from shattered CFLs? Well, don’t drop them. Greater hope of acquiring attention not gained by poisonous vapors might be found in another drawback of the luminous swirlies: Because they last long but not forever something must be done with them when their life span has expired.
As the Associated Press points out in a story published Monday in The News Virginian, “Few are ... volunteering to collect the mercury-laced bulbs for recycling.” That results in the bulbs’ risks being toted to landfills and incinerators and the kind of burgeoning environmental legacy — driven by the sale of 380 million CFLs last year — that has bequeathed upon the American lexicon such terms as Superfund, along with E-focused acronyms such as EPA and DEQ.
At least mercury does not cause global warming. Just tunnel vision, slurred speech and loss of hearing, among other things. Break a second bulb after the first, in other words, and perhaps you will neither see nor hear the crash, which is fine, since Poison Control wouldn’t understand when you called to explain anyway.
Conservation of energy is a worthwhile cause. But facts sometimes cast shadows. In this case and others, environmentalists direct us to the light while blinded to the deep darkness of their own vacuity.